On Easter, Bunnies are Fine, Horses are Not

If you drove out to Aqueduct Sunday, they were happy to take your money at the Resorts World Casino. You could have played the slots until they emptied the very last dollar from your pocket or you fell over from exhaustion. The casino opened at 10 a.m. and did not close until 6 a.m. the following morning. Under the same roof and at the same facility there is, of course, horse racing. But Aqueduct was closed Sunday. Betting on horses in New York on Easter is not legal. Slots, yes. Horses, no.

Of course, the New York horseplayer could have sat at home and played the races on their computer through an ADW on Easter. So what's the big deal? I mean, does anybody really go to the track anymore? So have a nice meal with the family, hide the Easter eggs in the backyard for the kiddies and then carve out a few hours to play the races at Golden Gate, Gulfstream, Laurel, Santa Anita, Woodbine, Sunland, Emerald.

Ah, not so fast. The New York morality police don't allow that either. No betting on horses means no betting on horses. If you have an ADW account in New York and you want to place a bet on an out-of-state signal on Easter forget about it. It's not allowed.

What to do?

You can go to a bar and get blasted. Liquor sales are OK?

You can go to the neighborhood convenience store and buy lottery tickets? Isn't that gambling? Well, yes, but it's not gambling on horse racing which is, somehow, more evil than gambling on the lottery.

Think Mike Trout is going to have a big day for the Angels? Matt Harvey is sure to throw a gem for the Mets? Then draft them on your daily fantasy sports team on DraftKings. Daily fantasy sports is gambling on sports that the politicians and the sports league insist is not gambling on sports.

And, of course, you can go to the casinos or the slot places at the racetracks and gamble and drink and gamble and drink some more.

In New York, on Easter, not all sins are created equal.

Actually, when it comes to Holy Week, New York racing and stupidity, this story has been going on for years.

In 1973, New York State legalized Sunday racing. Not everyone was pleased.

“What we're saying is that it's all right to go in rags to the parimutuel windows on Sunday,” Assemblyman Louis Ingrassia, Republican of Middletown told the New York Times back then.

(Ingrassia died in 2007. If people do indeed spin in their graves he must be turning at about 200,000 revolutions per minute in his final resting place as New York's politicians have said it's alright to go in rags to get cleaned out at the slot parlor at the Big A on not just Sunday but Easter Sunday).

“We are breaking the Third Commandment to keep the Sabbath,” Assemblyman John A. Esposito, Republican of Queens Village, also told the Times.

It appears that in order to appease the politicians who had reservations about Sunday horse racing, a compromise was reached. Racing would not be allowed on Palm Sunday or Easter. I don't claim to be an expert on religion, but while racing was banned on Palm Sunday, it has always been allowed on Good Friday.

In 2015, 42 years after this absurd situation all started, something finally changed. Legislation was passed to lift the ban on racing on Palm Sunday. But the Easter ban lived on. Why?

For me, while I like jelly beans, Easter is about as important as Groundhog Day. But that's me. I understand it is an important and sacred day for many Americans and I even understand why some people believe it is inappropriate to have betting on horse racing on such a day. Then, if you must, shut down all gambling in the state on Easter.

It's not that they halt betting on racing on Easter. Can someone in Albany please explain to me why it is legal to gamble on everything under the sun on Easter but horse racing? Is there a passage somewhere in the Bible that says “Thou shalt not bet on horses on Easter but playing slots, craps or blackjack is fine with us. Oh, and remember, always split aces and eights.”

I hate hypocrisy. It drives to me drink. Drinking makes me lose my discipline. Losing my discipline causes me to lose money gambling. So maybe New York is right where I want to be on Easter. A trip to Resorts World Casino at Aqueduct actually sounds like a good idea. Throw down a few drinks while I'm there. Take advantage of their special Easter promotion–“Eggstra Free Play.” On Easter only, you earn 50 points for $15 free play. (Whatever that means?). Lose my shirt playing the slots, the most mindless gambling game ever invented. Take the two bucks I have left in my pocket after hitting the casino and try to get out by buying a Powerball ticket at the Quickee Mart on the way out. Head home, dejected but still proud of myself. After all, I didn't commit the unpardonable sin. I did not bet on a horse on Easter. There's a place in heaven for people like me.